The style of this poem is inspired by Sherman Alexie’s poem, “Crazy Horse Boulevard,” reprinted in The Best American Non Required Reading (2013).
i. carrying this much weight in my legs feels oppressive. why would anyone want to be thick? being thick and especially needing to be thick is oppressive.
ii. i know i won’t feel thick in another day. i won’t feel thick in a parallel dimension which is just another day. i won’t feel thick on the other side of this hormonal cycle, after 6 o’clock in the evening, or during a different phase of the moon.
iii. was my heaviness the reason i surprised you into thrusting into me in the air and never texting me again? or was the flesh that i didn’t have to pool and puddle and push up behind me when i walk in front of you down the river path to blame for your ass-smacking, self-confident, long-stroking, “i can speak for all black people” proclamation never speaking to me again?
iv. can you write to me again?
Alternative options to thick are like a safety school: you don’t really want them but must consider the possible benefits.
vi. white girls write poems about black imaginary body standards when they are mortally hurt by a black man in the style of a previous black man that they loved.